Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Geesh, I am such a drama queen.

I have been out of my blogging loop for a bit. I have been reading faithfully, ya'll, and thinking about commenting or, heck, even posting at my own site. But I have bit a bit too down at the mouth.

I don't talk about my job. It is one of the blogging rules: you don't talk about your job cause you could get fired if the wrong people read. I won't break that rule now except to say I am...unsatisfied. I am taking measures. When I see how those measures work out, I will let you know.

The thing is this: I am smart. Honors student. Creative. Theatre major. Funny. Trust me on this one. And I care about people. And none of those muscles are being flexed.

Instead, I feel like an imbecile. Like a caricature of a secretary. It causes me to doubt my own particular talents, though I know they are true.

I know most people are unsatisfied in their work, and yet are able to muscle through it. I know I am not this type of person. I need to feel I am accomplishing something. That I am an integral part of the team.

So please forgive me for the morose tidings. Please forgive me for not being here. I put so much effort into Happy Family Time in order to combat everything else that I never seem to have the energy for glibness.

Keep me in your thoughts, and know I am thinking about you all. I am here.

5 comments:

Ash said...

I'm glad you aren't dead, m'dea.

Rima said...

I hope you can work it out. I miss ya, but I totally understand. I'm thinking of taking a little bloggy break, myself.

She Likes Purple said...

I hope it all goes smooth and well for you. I'll be thinking of ya.

ihearthayden said...

I'm sorry the people you work with are not sociably intelligeny enough to realize what amazing talents theyre wasting. Always know I tjink you are amazingly creative, utterly brilliant, and unbelievably kind. Not to mention fabulous. I love you wth all my heart, my mind, and my soul...and I know you deserve better. I also know you are strong enough to hang in there a while if you have to. I hpe you find something worthy of you in the near, near future.

Loralee Choate said...

Hmm...

Although, I totally believe you are talented in the theatrical arena, I don't see this post as being a "Drama Queen"

For example, your post is devoid of CAPS! EXCLAMATION POINTS!! ADVERBS LIKE "STAGGERINGLY!", "WRETCHEDLY!!", AND "HORRIFYINGLY!!!".

(I'm very adept at all of the above.)

Instead, I see a very real issue that lots of people face. When you have poor job satisfaction it can make life miserable.

I really hope that the things that you try work out and that it improves for you.